Two freshman philosophy students see the following bulletin posted on the
wall of their lecture hall:

Crash Course in Logical Assumptions
Saturday, September 26, 1998, All Day

Neither of them knows what it means and they are both curious. The pair
decide to find the professor and ask some questions. When they locate the
professor’s office, the bolder of the two enter the building while the other
remains outside.

Student: “Uh…Sir..What does Crash Course in Logical Assumptions
mean?”

Professor: “Well, it involves taking information that you have, forming
assumptions using logic, and then creating new information. Let me try to
answer your question by asking you a question. Do you own a car?”

Student: “Uh…Yes, I do.”

Professor: “Well, then I can now logically assume that you drive.”
Student: “Yes, I drive. “

Professor: “Then I can logically assume that you drive on weekends.”
Student: “Yeah, I drive on weekends, I go out on dates.”

Professor: “Then I can logically assume that you have date partners.”
Student: “Well, yes, I have a girlfriend.”

Professor: “Then I can logically assume that you are heterosexual.”
Student: “Uh…hell yes! OK, I think I understand what this course is about

now. Thanks a lot for your time.”

Once back outside, his friend asks him: “So, what’s it all about?”
“Its about using information and stuff…Let me answer your question by
asking you a question. Do you own a car?”
“No.”
“Uh…Then you’re homosexual, dude!”

A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use a million frog legs. The restaurant owner was shocked and asked the man where he could get so many frog legs! The farmer replied, “There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs —millions of them. They all croak all night long and they are about to make me crazy!” So the restaurant Owner and the farmer made an agreement that the farmer would deliver frogs to the restaurant, five hundred at a time for the next several weeks. The first week, the farmer returned to the restaurant looking rather sheepish, with two scrawny little frogs. The restaurant owner said, “Well… where are all the frogs?” The farmer said, “I was mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the pond. But they sure were making a lot of noise!”

Next time you hear somebody criticizing or making fun of you, remember, it’s probably just a couple of noisy frogs. Also remember that problems always seem bigger in the dark. Have you ever laid in your bed at night worrying about things which seem almost overwhelming like a million frogs croaking? Chances are pretty good that when the morning comes, and you take a closer look, you’ll wonder what all the fuss was about.